Shiver me timber!!

City officials in St. Petersburg, Fla., said a company tricked its way into using two of the city's landmarks to shoot scene for a hard-core sex movie, according to a Local 6 News report. Two of St. Peterburg's most family-friendly landmarks, The HMS Bounty ship and The Pier, were the settings for scenes from the popular adult movie "Pirates." "They told us they were shooting a PG-13 scene, a Sinbad type of comedy, that would have skeletons and sword fighting in it," Pier spokeswoman Susan Robertson said. Rumors began to spread last summer when the supposed PG-13 movie was being shot. The movie plot involves a pirate seeking world domination but includes graphic, pirate-themed sex, according to the report.

***Graphic pirate-themed sex?!?!?! I bet it has something to do with booty!!! Aaarrrrrrr!

Dad is a fink

Facing a heroin possession charge, a father with a prior bank robbery conviction did what any other family-man felon would do — he ratted out his son and helped police set him up.

The son — James Adam Drown, 26, of Pembroke — was lured into a bank robbery scheme, his lawyer said during a hearing in U.S. District Court yesterday.

Police supplied the vehicles, gloves, a gun, and an undercover FBI agent drove the father and son around casing banks on the Seacoast, said the lawyer, Joseph Caulfield. All the time, Dad was wearing a wire, prosecutors acknowledge.

“Yet my client is charged with attempted bank robbery,” Caulfield said during a bail hearing. “This bizarre situation does not lead to my client being held.”

Drown was ordered to be held without bail until a yet-unscheduled plea hearing. Federal Magistrate James Muirhead said he was a danger to the community.

During the bail hearing yesterday, prosecutor Terry Ollila would not identify Drown’s father because of the ongoing investigation.

***What a great dad!!!

Done in by a banana

Slovenian migrant Ivanka Perko died in hospital last week in bizarre circumstances - she suffered complications after she dropped a banana on her leg.

Comical to the end, the 73-year-old old quipped to friends and family while on her deathbed: "I can't believe after all this time it was a bloody banana that killed me."

A family friend told The Saturday Daily Telegraph yesterday that Ms Perko - who was treasured by her Blue Mountains community - had been ill for several months with a condition that made her skin delicate and fine.

"She had tried to open a banana and dropped it," the friend said. "The pointy end scraped down her leg and she died from complications."

Even her death notice revealed her strange demise, killed by a falling banana.

***I always tried to convince my mother that fruit could be harmful and that candy was better. Now I have proof!!